The Jadedvisalian

Welcome to the 2nd season of Stan Prolongo. Story written by Justin Lowmaster from The Space Turtle Blog. Voice of Stan Prolongo provided by DAVe Avila from The Jen and DAVe Show. If you have a podcast and would like to use Stan Prolongo for content in your show. Please do 2 things for us. Cut of only the ending credits and link back to this site. Thank you!

I sat down to put some serious effort into the clues I had. A card with the word Araneae from the late Mothman impostor and a bone spider from the back of the giant carp. I had an idea these two things were connected, although I didn’t know why. My first destination was Wikipedia, the oracle of all things fandom, with a few pages of useful facts thrown in. I looked up Araneae and found it meant spider. I looked for all kinds of information on bone spider carvings. I used Google, Bing, and even tried Wolfram Alpha. Nothing. While at Wolfram Alpha I typed in ‘Stan’ and found there was a statistical chance I was 51 years old.

Before I pounded the pavement, I still wanted something else to work with. I looked up Spiders and Visalia. I found an interesting article about the new grocery store being built. The construction site is over top a buried mausoleum. In the place of the dead rested the body of Baron von Eighlegs, a lover of spiders.

With a solid fact to work with, I headed out to the library. I looked around the city archives but anything related to the baron could not be found. Three volumes were clearly missing. I walked up to the librarian. She was a cute lady with black rimmed spectacles. I asked her about the missing volumes. She told me they were kept in a special room with the rarest texts because they contained original documents from Visalia’s history. She looked me over carefully. I started to look her over carefully, but she gave me that evil eye only librarians can give. She asked who I was and why I needed to see them.

“Stan Prolongo, private investigator,” I says. “I’m interested in learning about Baron von Eighlegs.”

She gave me another once over. “I like your new shoes.” she says. “Let me show you the books.”

She led me to a back room and unlocked the door with a large silver key. The room’s light dimly illuminated ancient books and tomes. She warned not to read just any old book. Some were dangerous. I thought she was just being silly until I heard one growl at me when I walked past. Finally I found myself at a small table with the three books. I had to wear white cloth gloves. I asked the librarian that if I wore a top hat if she would be looking for a sharp dressed man. She just gave me a sarcastic smile and told me to leave the books on the table when I left and to check out before I left. She left me alone to research.

After several hours I found that the Baron had sailed from Anansilvania to America in the late 1800s. He lived alone right on the spot where the grocery store was to be built. He was also buried there by his only son. An odd thing was, the location was also an old Indian burial mound. Disappointingly, I couldn’t find anything else of interest. Maybe I could ask the librarian for help. I left the books and went to find her. She was missing. On her desk I found a tiny spider, carved from bone.

Stan Prolongo by David Avila is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

 

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Me and the Fam went down to the Mooney Grove Park Centennial celebration. Lots of free stuff and booths and food. We saw old cars and other antiques. The Tulare county museum was open to the public and I totally forgot how cool it was. In the back are buildings transported to br preserved.

Welcome to the 2nd season of Stan Prolongo. Story written by Justin Lowmaster from The Space Turtle Blog. Voice of Stan Prolongo provided by DAVe Avila from The Jen and DAVe Show. If you have a podcast and would like to use Stan Prolongo for content in your show. Please do 2 things for us. Cut of only the ending credits and link back to this site. Thank you!

Before I did any serious research, I wanted to replace my shoes. At the I walked into the store to get a new pair. The girl behind the counter didn’t acknowledge me when I entered. Normally this bothers me, but her face looked like it was peeled right from the picture in the dictionary entry for dejected. Hoping the trail of flour on the floor wouldn’t increase her plight, I walked right up to her.

“Why the unhappy face?” I asked.

Startled, she looked at me. She said she was sorry, and that something was on her mind. I asked if I could help remove it from her brain. She looked at me all queer like for a second, then shrugged. She pulled up her left sleeve. Another sleeve lay underneath, covering her arm, but not a cloth sleeve, it was a tattoo.

“You don’t like your tattoo?” I asked.

“Don’t like it?” she said. “I didn’t even want one. I just woke up with it today!”

I asked her how much she drank last night. She glared at me, then told me she didn’t drink, even if all her other high school friends did. “Look!” she said, then pulled up her other sleeve, revealing her other arm. “I only got vandalized on one side, so now I’m …” she looked at her blank arm. “… Lopsided.”

I asked if she knew who did it. She didn’t. I told her I was a private eye, and I’d investigate for her. She said she didn’t have the money. I said she could just give me her employee discount on the shoes. She took a moment to consider, then agreed.

New shoes on my feet, I broke them in following the clues she had given me. I went to her apartment and looked for evidence outside. She didn’t want me going inside, since she really didn’t know who me, but I did what I could. I found some footprints outside a window that had been forced open. I took a digital photo of the print and went back to my office. The print looked familiar. My case notes might tell me why.

I sat in my chair and chewed on a pen as I stared at the photo. When I started tasting ink, I decided I was thinking too hard and threw away the ruined pen. It took a while, but eventually it pulled a memory out of the depths of my mind. A kid stabbed a gentleman and ran from the law. The movie Dead End. I’d watched it at Visalia Theater. Many people have scoffed at my filing system of envelopes, boxes, and old movie ticket stubs. I always remember the past by what movies I was watching on the silver screen. I found the right box and there it was, a photo of a shoe print made of paint. Taking the old photo with me, I walked out into the streets to find the villain of this tale of ink and home invasion.

As I pulled Tommy Allen by his arm to the shoe store, I explained to him than when I told him to stop graffiting the buildings, that I didn’t mean he should graffiti something else. He told me he had seen Miami Ink and It Takes a Thief on the television box and couldn’t help himself. When we got in the store, I made him apologize. He looked pretty pitiful apologizing on his knees and explaining how to better secure her apartment against intruders. She looked at her arm and decided she actually kind of liked it, but wanted the other arm done too to make up for it. Tommy obliged and promised never to break into a home or tattoo people while they slept again.

Stan Prolongo by David Avila is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

 

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My Friend Jeff “RoneyZone” Roney has a new audio production coming out today. Me and my kids are in it too. It is a bible story unlike anything done before that I know of. It is real and gritty and surprising. You will throw open a bible and check if this story is even in there. Check out his other productions too.

RoneyZone Productions have taken you to many places in our audio productions, but we now take you back in time to the days of the Bible. Jeff always had the idea to bring some of the incredible stories of the Bible to life, as if they were lived by real people. This is not just a “read the lines from the Bible,” project. This is as if a Hollywood producer/director of films today would sit down and bring the characters and situations to life, even if some of the characters weren’t specifically mentioned in the story. We keep the intent of the story and translate it into a story as if you were taken back to the time, and listen to it unfold before you.

Cast:
Hosea (The Prophet) – David Ault
Gomer (The Prostitute) – Ara Pelodi
Shopkeeper and other various voices – Jeff Roney
Priest – Dave Avila
Marcus – Nathan P. Butler
Hosea and Gomer’s children – Abigail and Sophie Avila

Many times I heard from people that they weren’t interested in doing “a Bible story” production. Obviously, if that feeling is a religious or anti-religious decision, you are free to make those decisions. However, if it because you are wary of the quality of the final product (because of bad religious audio projects in the past), I hope you see that when RZP does a production, we do our best, to make it the best. The only way we can get better, is to get a larger and more diverse group working on these projects.

I DO NOT exclude anyone from working on my projects based on their religious beliefs or non-beliefs. I am committed to the project, and as long as we can agree on that, then I think we both can work together to make it the best possible.

I understand this is a radical idea – people who don’t agree ideologically working on a project that some don’t agree with, but I want the best, and I need everyone who feels the same way. The sad thing is that even people who are Christian actors, are uneasy with my bringing this story to life. So, as you can see, I have painted myself in a corner; Too Christian for Non-Religious actors, Too Racy for Religious actors. So, if you find value with this, and want to help me, let me know:

jeff.roney@gmail.com

Thanks.

 

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Welcome to the 2nd season of Stan Prolongo. Story inspired by Jen Avila and written by DAVe Avila. Voice of Stan Prolongo provided by DAVe Avila from The Jen and DAVe Show. If you have a podcast and would like to use Stan Prolongo for content in your show. Please drop us a request in a comment and we will contact you. (continue reading…)

 

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On September 26, 2009, I gave my testimony. Though not complete. It does say a lot about me and where I came from. I must warn you. This is explicit and not the nasty kind. The kind that that will touch a nerve and make you reflect. It’s very intense and very real. Being allowed to tell it changed my life and touched others.

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