The Jadedvisalian

The questions is: should we play games that in the real world would make us criminals?

 

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Welcome to the 2nd season of Stan Prolongo. Story written by Justin Lowmaster from The Space Turtle Blog. Voice of Stan Prolongo provided by DAVe Avila from The Jen and DAVe Show. If you have a podcast and would like to use Stan Prolongo for content in your show. Please do 2 things for us. Cut of only the ending credits and link back to this site. Thank you!

I now had two bone spiders. A large one from the huge fish, and the small one from the librarians desk. I realized I had never asked her name. I looked at the desk and saw her nameplate. “Collette.” The obvious thing to do was go shopping.

I needed cover, so I headed out towards the countryside to the river. There I visited the rusty van. Mosley the homeless man had what I needed; a grocery cart. I’d have taken one from another store, but they all had those devices that made the wheels lock up if they got too far away from the store. Mosley’s was taken long before that. I knocked on the side door of the van. Mosley leaped around from the side of the van and came at me with a knife. He laughed like a hyena who’d taken crazy pills.

“Come here and steal from me!” he says. “How about I steal from you instead! Give me your money!”

I said I would be keeping my money if he was going to be all threatening like. Before I could say why I was there, he attacked.

He thrust the knife but I jerked sideways and avoided the blade. He swung and I ducked. This went on for a while, him attacking, me blocking. I ended up tripping in a hole and Mosley jumped me and held a knife to my neck and took my wallet.

“Two bucks, you fought that hard for two bucks?” he says, looking in my nearly empty wallet.

“I thought you were going for the $200 in my shoe,” I says. He went for my shoe and I kicked him in the face. He staggered back into the van and he dropped his knife.

“My nose!” he said, sounding like someone had just kicked him in the face.

“Listen,” I says. “I’m going to borrow your shopping cart.”

“No, you can’t,” he tells me.

I hold my foot up to his face.

“I mean yes, you can, just don’t …”

I tip over the cart and dump everything out.

“… dump everything out.”

I pushed the cart back to town and headed to the site of the new grocery store.

I began rolling the cart through the metal framing and avoiding drying cement.

“Hey yous!” yells a voice.

A man in a construction hat comes my way.

“What are you doing?” he says.

“I’m with the grocery cart commission. I’m making sure this location obeys all the regulations for shopping carts.”

“Yeah, ok, but I mean, why aren’t you wearing a hard hat?”

“I forgot?”

“Those yahoos are supposed to give them to any visitors. Hey, shouldn’t you be escorted?” He looked at me and reached for his walky talky.

“Let me borrow your hat.” I says and I grab it from his head.

“I need that!” he says. I knock him over the head with it. He falls over and I hide him in a stack of sheet rock. Then I replace my fedora with the hard hat, wearing it just so. I kept searching the location for clues.

Clues found me when a small hoard of zombies began chasing me. I picked up a nail gun and aimed for a head.

The zombie put up his hands.

On a hunch, I asked “Did Araneae put you up to this?”

They looked at each other, then scattered. I pushed the cart towards one and knocked him over. I pinned him down the the front wheels of the cart.

“You aren’t real zombies, are you?” I says.

He shook his head.

“Tell me what is going on, or I make all these wheels wobbly by running over you repeatedly.”

The zombie took one look at the cart wheel by his face and sang.

“This guy, he calls himself Araneae, came to us and says we need to scare the people away from here. We overheard him talking to himself, he does that a lot, about making this whole town pay for what they did. I don’t know what he means, though.”

“Why are you working for him?”

He looked dumbfounded.

“I, I dunno, I thought I had too.”

“Did you want too? Why did you think you had too? How did he contact you?”

“We read about a zombie flash mob and showed up. He was there, and, he started talking, then, I can’t remember what happened next, but next thing I know, I’m door knock ditching and shambling about the city, making people think that odd things are happening. I think there are others too, doing other things.”

I ask if he’s seen lots of spiders.

“Well, Araneae likes em, so, yeah.”

“Bone ones?”

“Yeah, I see them all over. Hey, is there one one me?”

He began frantically checking his body. I took the cart off him and helped him up. There on the back of his neck was a small bone spider. Its legs dug into the skin. I pulled it free.

“Ow!” He looked around quizzically. “Where am I?”

“Do you remember what you’ve been doing recently, or where you’ve been?”

“No.” He looked at his watch. “Two weeks! I don’t remember the last two weeks!”

“You mean you can’t lead me to Araneae’s secret lair?”

“Araneae? No, I just met him, well, two weeks, I’ve gotta get outta here!”

“Wait, your other zombie friends, they are under the control of these.”

I help up the tiny spider.

“What?” He touched the back of his neck, a look of realization in his eyes. “So that’s what … lets find them!”

Stan Prolongo by David Avila is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

 

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On an outing to Walmart to pick up some cleansing items. We walked past a wall of christmas stuff. Amongst the goods I founds this cute little thang.

But everything is cute at first until you see it’s dark side.

At work I receive the mail and sometimes we get samples in the junk mail. This little globe showed up and I thought it was kinda neat.

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